Saturday, April 6, 2013

0 STC Saturdays: Misadvendtures of a Blood Bowl Commissioner #1

Thirteen Coaches along with thirteen teams are all fighting it out in the inaugural season of the V-NUFFLE Blood Bowl League. I am one of those coaches but somehow someway I am also the Commissioner of this league of misfits. Saying that makes me feel like I am in one of those Hair Club for Men. You know the one I am talking about; "Not only am I the president but I am a client". Weaves and hair-plugs aside I am not even sure how I ended up in this position. First off I have never played the game and second I have never been a commissioner of any sort of league before. Needless to say this is going to be one hell of a misadventure of a Blood Bowl Commissioner.

Taking the opposite page from the Commissioner of the NFL I feel that I may just be able to pull this off if I protect the integrity of the V-NUFFLE and to make sure the game is as violent as possible. Conan the Linebacker said it best when asked "What Is Best In Life?" "To Crush Your Enemies, To See Them Driven Before You, And To Hear The Lamentations Of The Cheerleaders!" In the end the only thing that matters is that it's all fun and games as long as someone loses an eye. Enough with the quotes lets get down to business. What is my business though as the Commissioner?

1/ Manage the League;
2/ Solve rule disputes; and
3/ Provide players with illegal drug enhancements.

The first of these three duties is the largest and biggest time vampire. Getting this league off the ground has been one hell of a task but remarkable an enjoyable one. After finding thirteen coaches that were willing to play I had to get each of them to submit a team roster. This was test of each of their commitment to the league. Low and behold they each met the task with remarkable speed. Yes one of them hired a grot to do the accounting which resulting in his team breaking the one million salary cap but hey this sort of thing is bound to happen when dealing with Orcs, Goblins and the followers of Chaos. From here I have to establish a rule set to keep everyone on the same page. This is where I am currently at.
I have gotten to this point thanks to the popular social group FaceSmash. Without it I would be caught up in a web of emails, deceit and lies. FaceSmash has provided the me with a lounge for where I can let the coaches unwind and commit acts of debauchery with the Bloodwiser Girls. It is tales like this that I hope to bring each and everyone of you over the course of this Blood Bowl season. If these tales turn out be just be actual tails cause by chaotic mutations fear not as I will also be showing casing my Blood Bowl Team. No matter which way the ball wobbles this is going to be one hell of a bloody season.

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